Choose Life!

Since the last blog entry, my head’s been all over the shop – in a good way though! ABoF is busy as ever and my other projects are slowly bubbling away. Again, I really don’t want to jinx anything right now but there are some really cool wee bits happening here and there in the next few months, I’m really excited!

I felt after over 2 weeks since the last entry, I’d better write something on here and keep the good vibes ever flowing and if it’s all brain junk nonsense, do forgive me!

This is going to sound really morbid, but it’s not meant that way at all, but I’ve really been thinking a lot about how short my life is and just how mortal we all are! It’s like this is the year I’ve finally woken-up and realised that I don’t have much time to do what I really want in life so I better get going right now!

My twenties have been a real adventure and I’ve met a lot of great folk. Some have come and gone, others have started on the next chapter of their lives with babies and marriage, but I feel the last 8 years in London has been a brilliant philosophical, moral and spiritual foundation for the rest of my life now. I’ve done great things, bad things, stupid things but have also made many happy memories. I’ve laughed until I’ve hurt, cried my eyes out and learned a lot about relationships and people – what works, what doesn’t, who to treasure and so on. Now I’m thinking, there’s not much time left to do very much. Although I still have no desire for children, I can even see why some of our friends are just going ahead and having them now. Sure it’ll mean they lose some freedom in other areas but I guess you can’t put things off forever.

A "happy" memory - lying on the beach in Barcelona, Sept 2009

So I’m choosing my life path now and I don’t feel uncertain or scared about it. I doubted myself a lot before – my writing, my ability to be a leader, my creativity and my relationships but I simply don’t anymore. Maybe this is a product of being slightly older and wiser, if so then, bring on the wisdom! I’m really enjoying this new found sense of confidence and ease about things.

I’m really aware at any moment things can change, people can change and situations too but I just want to push forward and try it all, do it all and do it NOW! Even if things don’t work out the way I planned, as long as we can always say “at least I tried” and that’s all we can hope for really when we’re lying in our beds as wee old grannies and grandpas – I don’t want to look back on a life riddled with pain and anguish.

There are still definitely things that could be handled better and I’d like to sort some of the daily problems and ongoing niggles out but they are definitely on the list at least. There’s also still lots and lots of room for improvement within myself but I’m finding myself actually saying things internally now like “you should apologise” or “don’t say things like that, say it better” etc. It may take a while for my stubborn old brain to process these thoughts but at least they’re there!

I guess the crux of this little blog post is to convey the message – enjoy your life, enjoy each day! We have one shot, let’s not blow it!

Have a great week everyone – Wee C x

 

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